NO EXPERIENCE NECESSARY = Beware! By Luke Simmons

After university, I drove 1800km up to Brisbane for a bit of a working holiday. Having no experience, I became frustrated at the lack of interest my resume was gathering so I pounced on this plum-looking Marketing & Sales job which read “NO EXPERIENCE NECESSARY”. I immediately got on the phone & was offered an interview that day. I nailed the interview & was asked whether I’d be available the next day for a trial. Although it wasn’t clear what they actually sold, I turned up at 7am the next day & met up with my two “trainers” who explained that we were going to head down the Gold Coast. After asking exactly what the company sold, I got a convoluted answer back & my heart sunk when I realised that we were going to be selling miscellaneous goods (see: crap) to workers in an industrial estate. Now, I was 50km from home & carrying an arm full of giant fly swatters for my “trainers”. Their strategy was to walk into the workplace, interrupt everyone & run through their specials of the day. I thought I was going to get beaten up at one stage when we walked into a meat processing factory and our spiel was cut off half way by this massive guy who stormed over to shut him up. As he was forcing us to clear off, he looked at me & said “so these guys showing you the ropes are they?”. At least I had a fly swatter to defend myself! Anyway, I trudged through the streets for the whole day & let the guys know at the end that [a] I respect their hard work but [b] this aint for me.


in Luscombe, Queensland, Australia

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I believe that life is a (relatively) short ride and that it's crucial to squeeze as many good times out of it as possible. I love travelling, music, reading, writing, all kinds o' sport, & my wife!

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