5 hour energy By Ronan Hughes

One day a friend of mine who shall remain unknown got his hands on some 5 hour energy. The label seemed interesting enough showing numbers that went into the 1000s. So being the dumbasses we were we downed 2 bottles each.

The sickening orange flavor tasted like how I can only describe as liquified extremely caffeinated orange starburst and that's only the taste. Now normally I would expect to be very hyper after ingesting this. What I instead got was a gastrointestinal atom bomb. So basically what I'm saying is you either throw this shit up or comes out of your ass.

I made a desperate run to the toilet and threw up the past 3 meals I had that day. My friend on the other hand wasn't so lucky and shat his pants.

Around 10 in the morning I woke up with dried vomit on my face lying in the kitchen with a bottle of seltzer filled with vomit and a half eaten banana. I don't want to know what happened that night nor do I remember (thank god)

So I guess the lesson of this story is don't ingest energy shots unless all bananas are away from you at all times and you are at least only 5 feet away from a toilet.


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