I’ve been seeing a guy for a little while now, and I noticed that I’m one for ‘realistic’ rather than ‘romantic' scenarios. The other day I would have spent two hours imagining what our break up lunch would be like. Like, not a whole two hours in one sitting, I’m not crazy- but across the day, as a running total, yes around two hours. I imagined what I would wear, where I was living, what I would eat (medium rare steak with mushroom sauce) and whether I would be seeing someone. Then I thought, “Ugh, crazy. Of course you would at least be pretending to see someone, just incase he was. Idiot!” People have started saying I’m unromantic, and this has started to make me think…maybe…I’m unromantic. I was telling the boyfriend (casual drop in there) about my imagined break up scenarios and I went on to say in a half-serious, half joking way, “Your next girlfriend is going to be so lucky after all the time and effort I’ve put into you…” Then I think he was trying to be nice, and he said, “Well, that’s crazy because I know I wouldn’t have the same love I have with you…” And I said back, “Well, no, no one would compare to me, but it would be a different kind of love. An inferior one”. (Humour and realism blended together there). For some reason, as ‘into’ someone as I can be, and as much as I want it work, there is always a creeping thought, “But, you know, you’re too young to have found someone forever so it probably won’t work out”. Does anyone else struggle with the romance?
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