On way to Southend test centre about ten years ago via the A127 which was gridlocked due to a lorry losing it's load of manure.
Well unfortunately this load of manure was a foot deep and my pupil was following a Porche which due to the low profile and thicker wheels churned up the manure all over my car, covering windscreen bonnet everything.
Well I had no time to wash the car and turned up with the car as it was.
The examiner asked my pupil which is his car for the test, my pupil replied:
"The one covered in sh*t and with the flies around it".