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Fun-Killers By Christopher Jordan

Last week I took a handful of antidepressants. I'm not depressed. I just thought it'd be trippy.

I'm happy to admit I've experimented with chemicals on more than 1 occasion, but I'd never tried mood-stabalizers. My parents weren't lazy pill-pop-enablers, despite the fact I acted like a dildo in school. But I wanted to know what they're like, and nothing helps 'learning' better than 'doing', right?

So I took 2 Citalopram (something my buddy got when he punched himself in the head) and 2 Diazepam (something you take after you get shot in video games) over the course of the day and they completely killed my vibe! For the next 3 days, I walked around like a robot, indecisive and unable to hold onto a coherent thought. I was indifferent to everything, unable to talk. I ignored everyone I met because I had nothing to say. At one point, 3 hot drunk chicks huddled around the tiny dog on my lap in a pub, smiling and stroking his wee head, all of 'em hovering 3 inches above the sweaty puddle of mutant flesh that is my crotch, and I just gave 'em the stink-eye! What the fuck is wrong with these pharmaceuticals? Is this the best we can do with crazy/creative people? Sedate 'em? Turn 'em into emotionless machines?

I, for one, would hate to have to take any of that boring, spirit-sucking stuff regularly. Life ain't that painful yet!

So stick with illegal drugs. They're much more fun! ...And also, maybe don't take medicine that isn't prescribed for you.


in Edinburgh, United Kingdom

 617

BE WARNED! My views and opinions are not for everyone. You should avoid reading anything I write if you respect religion, tolerance, sobriety or general human decency.

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