I've always wanted to fuck a black chick. I just do. Some people have goals and aspirations. They want a promotion, or a qualification, or to visit Italy... I wanna jizz on a negress girl, so she looks like chocolate jelly covered in slightly out-of-date cream. I don't know if that's... like... nobel or something. Like racial harmony through being a perv.
So 2 nights ago, I fuckin' got one! This sexy, new to town, didn't know what she was doing African girl came back to my house. We sat around with runny noses drinking well into 5am. Me and her on a fold out bed, and some buddies chopping lines on a table. Then as the sun came up, the guys said they were leaving.
They all got up to leave... except Matty.
Matty said with a big grin, "Naw, I'm staying like!" They argued, "Leave 'em to it man." He laughed and said, "Naw!"
That's fuckin' rule one of the bro code Matty ya fanny! Fuck off so I can finger the black chick before the drugs wear off!
Matty stayed, and sat pin-eyed talking to us for 4 hours. I was powerless. The black chick (who's name I can't remember) , who was still in bed with me, turned to Matty and asked, "What are you doing tomorrow? Do you want to go for a beer?"
Couldn't fuckin' believe it! Stole my coffee-babe!
But Matty said to her, "......eh, naw you're alright." Then silently laughed at me with a big 'fuck you Chris!' smile.
So he prevented me from shagging her so he could turn her down. I hate you Matty x